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Mayor retires, then pouts and licks himself

Mayor retires, then pouts and licks himself

Our latest column from William Thomas The world’s longest serving female mayor has recently retired. Recently the mayor of Mississauga, Hazel McCallion retired after 36 years in office and … Wait! No! “Hurricane Hazel” did not retire. She simply drove into a lamp post and fossilized on the spot before police arrived at the scene […]

Tim Hortons employees deserve “Bewilderment Benefits”

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Tim Hortons employees deserve “Bewilderment Benefits”

Our latest column from William Thomas We already have various types of incentive payments to accommodate abnormal job circumstances. For example, we have ‘danger pay’ for workers who walk the beams of skyscrapers under construction and ‘hardship pay’ for people who hold down jobs in remote or dangerous hot spots around the world. The military […]

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Squirrels! Rats with really nice tails

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Squirrels! Rats with really nice tails

Our latest column from William Thomas I’ve had it up to here with squirrels and when I say ‘here’ I mean the wood pile they scurry across knocking down hunks of firewood or the soffits they’re scratching to get into the attic or the privacy fence they use as a noisy playground. Why did the […]

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Trump – “Elect a clown; expect a circus”

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Trump – “Elect a clown; expect a circus”

Our latest column from William Thomas Oh how much I wish I’d written that line: “Elect a clown. Expect a circus.” Sometimes it takes the brevity of a bumper sticker to sum up dire situations like the current meltdown of the U.S. government and the separation of America into two warring camps. 1988 for example […]

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Now we gotta teach Driver’s Ed in kindergarten!?!

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Now we gotta teach Driver’s Ed in kindergarten!?!

Our latest column from William Thomas Yup, it’s happened again. The Very, Very, Very Young Drivers of Canada just inducted two new members, this time from Jarvis, Ontario. With details being quite scarce, I have recreated some of what happened. A couple of weeks ago two kids woke up at 6:30 am and hungry. So […]

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Girl Guides and the war I helped them avoid

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Girl Guides and the war I helped them avoid

Our latest column from William Thomas Good grief! Now President Donald Trump is going after the Girl Guides! Recently the Girl Guides of Canada cancelled their trip to a summer camp in California, worried that some kids of colour might be detained and turned back at the U.S. border. Members of the Guiding Movement are […]

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